If you're like me and have lived in a community where missionary activities are alive and well. Your church sends a team over to "love on" the children of a South American country or your school sends missions teams to somewhere in the majority world, you will be familiar with the following statements.
- "Spending in (fill in name of place) showed me that we don't need things to be happy".
-"I was so blessed by the joy of the people there, their situation did not bring them down".
Or my personal favourite...
"The children blessed me more than anything I could do for them".
Before I continue, I want to make it abundantly clear that I am in no way saying that these emotions are not valid. This is what service is supposed to do for us, it is supposed to bring to the fore our truest sense of gratitiude to our creator and giving thanks for a chance for us be a part of his process of healing the world. However, these phrases and dogma are not meant to be the object of this type of ministry.
This thought was as hurtful to me when God laid it in my heart...
So, today marked the end of week one of the Serve South Africa six-week internship. After days of planning and workshopping, we finally began to really dig into doing "missionary things" such as enjoying a day observing Vacation Bible School at a local church and today driving out to a nearby village to meet a local Pastor and engage with the children he so serves diligently along with his wife. They provide breakfast and lunch to kids, regardless of if their families are congregation members or not. They provide them with a safe place to play and engage other children. Their hard work goes beyond just that. It branches into HomeCare for the sick, afterschool programs for kids in school, lifestyle motivation for the elderly and even a Senior Citizen's social club.
I was very excited to be part of this, in my mind I thought "Oh what an opportunity to Love on the kids and make them happy" because that's what ministry meant to me, especially ministry in the developing world (which I am from but that is a story for a different kind of blog).
Indeed, the team enjoyed a very satisfying day of ministry and lots of belly-laughs with the beautiful children.
However, at our debrief later in the afternoon, God broke my heart. As I seat here now, alone with my own soul. God is saying to me, "Samora, the ministry you are involved in is not about you or the kids , pastors or any other person. This ministry only magnifies your brokenness and shows how weak your own love is. Allow me to fill you with love, so that when it pours forth, it comes from a place of worship".
Nothing has ever made more sense than that, service that focuses on us or the peple we are serving is futile. Service is an act of worship, it should break us down so that our weak human love is not what sustains us but our love be made perfect in Christ.
1st Corinthians 13:13 "Three things will last forever - faith, hope, and love - and the greatest of these is love".
This love that goes beyond your sinful nature - it loves you in your broken state, it says "Even though this world has made you filthy, evil, decietful, manipulative, conniving, lustful, sluggish,coveting but I have laid down my life so you will be blameless when you are in this love".
So, this is the love of effective ministry, this is love we want to have so that we can give. Go on, and let love be your greatest goal!
Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the first of many stories of missionary work and other tales of woe.